Ephemera

The ramblings of a lunatic expat.

I am Californian who relocated to Melbourne, Australia in 2006..

I'm a manicurist and a madwoman and I do a damn good job at both.

For some reason, Americans believe that the constant and dirt-cheap availability of Mexican food is a human right. Tell them there is nowhere to get an affordable burrito in, say, Merthyr Tydfil, and they will gape in shock, like you just sang the national anthem in Klingon.

The idea that their country has a lot of Mexican food because, er … they share a 800 mile border with Mexico, simply does not compute.

Mexican food should be everywhere. Like oxygen, or laughter. If it is not, the universe is fundamentally misaligned. Chris, Gwyneth is gone. But at least you don’t have to put up with this ridiculous behaviour anymore.

ayeshamus:

bananacasts:

mckelvie:

samhumphries:

latimes:

Apple says it is working to bring more racial diversity to emoji.
"There needs to be more diversity in the emoji character set, and we have been working closely with the Unicode Consortium in an effort to update the standard," Katie Cotton, vice president of worldwide corporate communications at Apple, wrote in an email to MTV.

F I N A L L Y

S R S L Y

This is great news, but what about some more food diversity? Sandwich? Cheese? Butter? I mean, the set can’t be forever stuck in Japanese culture circa 2004.

Where the fuck is the hockey emoji?!

How about a fucking cheese and taco emojis? Do you know how often I use the stupid people emojis? Never. Cheese and tacos? Constantly lamenting.

ayeshamus:

bananacasts:

mckelvie:

samhumphries:

latimes:

Apple says it is working to bring more racial diversity to emoji.

"There needs to be more diversity in the emoji character set, and we have been working closely with the Unicode Consortium in an effort to update the standard," Katie Cotton, vice president of worldwide corporate communications at Apple, wrote in an email to MTV.

F I N A L L Y

S R S L Y

This is great news, but what about some more food diversity? Sandwich? Cheese? Butter? I mean, the set can’t be forever stuck in Japanese culture circa 2004.

Where the fuck is the hockey emoji?!

How about a fucking cheese and taco emojis? Do you know how often I use the stupid people emojis? Never. Cheese and tacos? Constantly lamenting.

Reply

vasolinejesus:

erinmargrethe said: HI TODD THANK YOU FOR THE FRESNO UBER ALLES TSHIRT I need to send you and M a photo xx

You are very welcome.

Gotta represent, right?

But you are welcome.

If you haven’t figured it out, we came from the same town. So I made her a shirt cause she is living in Australia and sent it to her.

Gotta represent, right?

But you are very welcome.

Just don’t get your ass beat wearing it.

/this is me wearing it. Not her. She probably looks better wearing it then I do.

image

clarahnails:

It’s ADVENTURE TIME!!! #clarahnails #nailartmelbourne #melbournenailart #nailartinmelbourne #adventuretime #sofun #socolourful #socute #nailswag (at Clara H Nails )

I actually don’t like Adventure Time, but I know you nerds do, and I LOVE Miss Clara H, so the scale has tipped.

clarahnails:

It’s ADVENTURE TIME!!! #clarahnails #nailartmelbourne #melbournenailart #nailartinmelbourne #adventuretime #sofun #socolourful #socute #nailswag (at Clara H Nails )

I actually don’t like Adventure Time, but I know you nerds do, and I LOVE Miss Clara H, so the scale has tipped.

lnthefade:

My recent favorite phrases: This, too, shall pass and this is temporary. 

Everyone goes through shit. And you get through it. You get over that hump eventually. It’s how you get through and that you get through it that matters.

Life isn’t all flat land that’s easy to traverse. There are mountains and valleys and rocky roads. You keep moving. You keep going. It’s exhausting and sometimes painful but you keep going because the alternative is not something you want to entertain. So over this mountain we go, skinned knees and all. This terrain is just temporary until we reach flat land again. 

Onward.

Yeah.

idiot-legs:

tiltherewasyou:

FIRST KISS
We asked twenty strangers to kiss for the first time…

I think the beauty in this video is its simplicity and how vulnerable the people in it are and it’s so awkward and wonderful and lovely and makes me want to smoosh my lips against someone else’s lips and you should definitely watch this video.

I want to make out with the whole world <3

(via lil-c0met)

2brwngrls:

In which Snoop Dogg doesn’t give a fuck about your gender policing, and 50 Cent continues to be way too concerned about the sexuality of other male rappers. 

Amazing.

(via chicaartistanails)