Wait, no, I take it back.
20 year old me was a crap lay. How about 5-minutes-ago me? Time travel is confusing.
Dear 20-year old me
If I touched you there, would it be masturbation or gay sex? No matter, where’s your camera? I know you have a Polaroid.
If you shoved a vuvuzela into a dog’s ass and asked him to fart into a...– Michael K of Dlisted on Katie “Jordan” Price’s new dance single Michael K is my spirit animal
6 Famous Geniuses You Didn't Know Were Perverts →
The Way We Live Now - The Why-Worry Generation -... →
hammerito: erinmargrethe: nedhepburn: If you were born between 1982 and 2002, you should read this. (DISCLAIMER: This tirade is directed at the New York Times, not any/all followers, etc.) Holy revelations, Batman! Kids are spoiled and old people are stingy! Doesn’t this happen every ten minutes? An older generation says one collective, “BACK IN MY DAY…” and then tars the generation...
The Way We Live Now - The Why-Worry Generation -... →
nedhepburn: If you were born between 1982 and 2002, you should read this. This makes me extra-proud of my sister (b. 1986), who has a day job, an internship, and her own business, and my brother (b. 1991) who is backpacking and working his way around Europe.
Shacking up is hard to do: why Gillard may be... →
Hey Bettina, your time-machine is waiting to take you back to 1950. This summary is better than the actual article.
heythisisit: brimichelle: peter bjorn &...
I was 19 and in Australia for the first time doing a commercial. I didn’t know...– Cameron Diaz has a hard-earned thirst. (via clembastow) (via indefensible) Have I ever learned this the hard way. I’ve been drinking with Aussies for 10 years now (starting in 2000 while working on cruise ships) and occasionally I forget and try to keep up with them - and pay the price the...
Having a minor panic attack about turning 23 on...
pocketcontents: autismsucks: dbizzle: I didn’t even want 22 to come because I felt like I was getting old, and 23 is a whole year older than that. Plus I don’t like the number 23, which is ridiculous but true nonetheless. At least I’m not 25… now.. if this doesn’t just make me want to kill myself I am not sure what should .. I’ll be 35 in February…sigh.. to be 23 again I’m turning 41...
Australian Sex Party president Fiona Patten said the strip show “could only be...– Sex Party condemns Uluru stripper Down with this sort of thing. (via isay) If she did that on top of the Westboro Church we’d all want to give her a medal. Why is one culture’s magic woo-woo bullshit more valid than another?
No one posts pics of themselves where they think...
xntrek: sarkastickunt: So please stop saying you look fat, you look gross, you look old, you look ugly, you look tired, you look anything other than what you actually look like. You wouldn’t have posted that pic if you didn’t think you looked more than fine. Everybody knows, that the garbage shots get deleted. There are other ways to get attention other than causing other people to question...
Odd crushes →
isay: “Clarkson isn’t an out-of-touch millionaire with slightly tedious political views – he’s just the same as you. Well, not you. The annoying bloke you work with. He’s just the same as him.” — Top Gear: the six best comedy stunts | Television & radio | guardian.co.uk I care about cars less than anyone you will ever meet. I drove a series of shitbox-mobiles back in the States,...
7 Ways You Waste Money When Buying Beauty Products →
Fantastic. Love the Beauty Brains. This bit especially: Falling for Fear Have things you read on the Internet made you afraid of products with sulfates, talc, parabens, propylene glycol, etc.? Well, you are avoiding perfectly good, safe and effective products. There is no scientific evidence that suggests beauty products sold in the United States, Canada, EU or Japan are unsafe. There is also no...
You know what's fun?
Discovering yet another thing that you suck at. Well, not you. Me. I never knew I was really bad at arranging furniture in an empty room. How can you be bad at going, “I’m going to put this chair over here”? I don’t know. But I know I am.
And now it's in print.: Delivery imminent →
Just had a call from the printers to let us know that the papers are in a truck and being delivered to the And Now It’s In Print Offices (in reality the Floate Design Partners studio). We’ve had literally hundreds of RSVP’s for the launch and a large number of pre-sales – largely from people… Order a copy. You won’t regret it. I’ve had a sneak peek, and it’s gorgeous....
when I was a flight attendant, we had a bunch of Mexican nuns onboard a flight from San Antonio to Denver. On descent, they were all either fiddling with their rosaries or crossing themselves. Afterward, I told the pilots about it. The captain said, “Yeah, whatever. We land safely, God gets all the credit. If we crash, the fucker with four stripes takes the blame. What a crock.” Yeah,...
The Ikea crap is put together.
The desk/manicure table is the wrong color. I thought I grabbed a black one and it’s white. Could not be bothered exchanging it. I’ll spray paint it robin’s egg blue eventually and then decorate it with stencil-graffiti. Tomorrow I go in search of a pedicure basin. I want a galvanized metal tub or something similar. I need some towels. Then I have to figure out where...
claviusrobinsky: We’re having bed pizza. I feel like Erin and Ross. 10 Glad to see that my influence on important matters has such a long reach.
I just remembered
that nobody ever really gets glassed in the States, do they? I suppose it is a particular form of violence practiced by those without easy access to firearms.
The dreaded vuvuzela claims its first victim:... →
“You’ll burst your windpipe” is the new “you’ll shoot your eye out”.
I shouldn't complain too much
At least I mostly understand the rules of soccer. When we watch rugby I’m like WHY DO THOSE GUYS STOP EVERY FIVE MINUTES TO HUMP EACH OTHER, ROSS?