October 2009
wanna see something really scary? →
I read The Amityville Horror when I was…well, I had to have been under 10. Too young for something like that. I had nightmares for years. Only recently did I read that the entire thing was more than likely a hoax and a scam. My relief was actually a bit embarassing. I don’t believe in all that sort of stuff, but my imagination seems to. I absolutely can’t watch scary movies or...
AWWW
atsirhc:
Erin, i wooked at his widdle face!
i mean, i’m a goatee/sometimes beard kinda girl or even stubble is good. but i liked the clean shaven Ross, too! i think he still looks sexy.
NOW GO SIT ON HIS FACE AND SEE HOW DIFFERENT IT IS.
uh, did i type that outlou—fuckit, who gives a shit. you know me. <3
The funniest part is that he freaks out if I touch his face or kiss his cheek....
I HOPE EVERYONE THAT WAS FEELING SICK IS FEELING...
atsirhc:
or, if you’re not.. you could at least come breathe on me so i can miss some work.
jk, love you guys.
You do not want what I had, lady. Unless you want to get your tonsils removed in December, too. We can recuperate together at the beach house. Ross’ mum is going to look after me.
Things to stay tuned for:
Photos of Ross before his beard shave
Video of Ross before his beard shave
Video of Ross getting a proper shave with a straight razor at an old-school barber shop
Photos of Ross with a naked face
Video of Ross with a more meat than hair on his face
My weird, infected tonsil voice on the audio
It’s been a weird day
FACT:
atsirhc:
i do not like to use bar soap. i’d rather have the squeezy in a bottle kind.
Bar soap is just a holder for old pubes.
Kat relates an anecdote from the aquarium →
yhf:
erinmargrethe:
poeks:
[*walrus masturbating in full view of an onlookers*] Random child: Mommy, what’s that walrus doing? Kat’s Aunt: Masturbating.
HOLY SHIT My best friend and I saw a walrus doing that at Sea World (San Diego) about 15 years ago. He was underwater, right up against the glass, having a fine old time. There was a huge crowd and everyone was glued to the scene. Little...
Kat relates an anecdote from the aquarium →
poeks:
[*walrus masturbating in full view of an onlookers*] Random child: Mommy, what’s that walrus doing? Kat’s Aunt: Masturbating.
HOLY SHIT My best friend and I saw a walrus doing that at Sea World (San Diego) about 15 years ago. He was underwater, right up against the glass, having a fine old time. There was a huge crowd and everyone was glued to the scene. Little kids were...
Don't listen to him
I’m the one who told him he should do Movember. He’s just trying to drum up sympathy. As if I had willpower to cut myself off from sex. Ha!
I have theory that any ugly girl can get laid by...
themenguide:
Question from Myrm.
Sister, you got the wrong guy to be answering this question because I have turned down reasonably attractive women just for wearing bad shoes, having a Motorola Rockr or being named Geoffrey. But l’ll take a crack at your theory anyway because there is very little on television tonight apart from some show where the dog is a policeman or something. Maybe the...
Watch“Drugs are especially good for fat girls with weird-shaped heads”
My boyfriend finds ways to amuse himself even when...
He lays on top of me when I’m burning up with fever and verbally contemplates what my internal temperature might feel like.
He makes me say “Hi Stewie” because my voice becomes distinctly Marlee Matlin when I’m sick.
He makes me say any number of words with a hard “g” in them, because the swelling in my throat makes it impossible to produce a glottal stop. His...
I was whining about my career and suggested we...
indefensible:
stuffmygirlfriendsays:
“Where are we going to go? To the magical land of vaginas and cake?”
Yeah yeah yeah, I know I’m reblogging my own blog but this is one of the things that she says that for some reason gets me every time. In one phrase she skewers my self pity but redirects me to some kind of Xanadu so I don’t noticed the evisceration.
Then I remember that I don’t much...
If I could just ask each one if you for...
igotyourcrazy:
it would be that if you are healthy or relatively healthly be grateful. It is the most precious gift you have and the one you take the most for granted. No matter what awful things may be going on in your life, give thanks that you are alive and well. Ok, that’s all. Just remember that.
First of all, igotyourcrazy, all the best to you.
Secondly, damn straight. My bout with bad...
So, it's official now.
I can tell you guys.
I’m starting a new job in January. I’m going to be a travel agent. Yes, Australians still use travel agents! Isn’t that quaint? I’ll be trained on the job as I’ll be working for a very big chain travel agency (I’m not going to name it as I’m sure anyone from Australia can figure it out in two seconds). I’m excited. Look for a...
As I’ve now officially been diagnosed with tonsillitis* and put on antibiotics, my brain has gone into soft food overdrive. I caught the tram home, and even in my miserable state, the sight of a KFC almost had me leaping off at the next stop. I could demolish some of their pseudo-potato and gravy right now. The big size.
*For those of you who know about my tonsil travails, I normally suffer...
I hate unfollowing people for posting spoilers.
halfbakedidea:
lilykily:
doublejack:
It makes me feel like a petty dick.
But I do it. Every. Single. Time.
It’s an asshole move, I don’t blame you.
Funny, someone just unfollowed me after I posted the picture from this week’s Mad Men, which aired yesterday and has been written about all over the web and newsprint today. I’m not sure if this was aimed at me, but I’d like to think that...
Bronson Pinchot dishes the dirt to The Onion's... →
On working with Tom Cruise in “Risky Business”: “He was tense and made constant, constant unrelated homophobic comments, like, ‘You want some ice cream, in case there are no gay people there?’ I mean, his lingo was larded with the most… There was no basis for it. It was like, ‘It’s a nice day, I’m glad there are no gay people standing here.’ Very, very...
“What am I even saying? These are just ridiculous sound bites that you’re going...”
– January Jones via GQ
Chaos Reigns! Is The New Lars von Trier Film the... →
nedhepburn:
i mean, it really should be.
Someone (I can’t remember who/where/when - I would love to give them credit) described Antichrist as “Hostel with feelings” and I almost shat myself laughing.
I have not seen Antichrist, but I did read the wiki, which is what I do with every film I never plan on seeing. I have a weak stomach for that kind of torture-porn.
Collectors snap up jars of Vegemite iSnack 2.0 →
Maybe I should cash in my Beanie Baby portfolio and invest in some more iSnack 2.0
Every time I get cranky about this new apartment, I just go in my laundry room/storage closet/rubbish-bin room/hoarders closet and rearrange things on the shelves.
It’s my happy place.
inthefade:
vmarinelli:
“When you contest the citation, your argument can begin with ‘INNOCENT! UNTIL I’M PROVEN GUILTY! DENY EVERYTH—oh.’”
— @yhf, referencing lyrics to Circle Jerks’ Deny Everything, in reply to this tweet (“But OFFICER, I wasn’t texting while driving, I was Googling some Circle Jerks lyrics & also compulsively refreshing Twitter”). EXCEEDINGLY WELL PLAYED, SIR.
That is...
Thoughts on abortion by someone who has been... →
funsizebytes:
This isn’t a story that we share lightly.
If that “database of people who have had an abortion” exists, I hope the ACLU sues the hell out of them.
And I hope everyone who supports it has to go through what we went through.
Back later.
Dear friends of ours had to go through something very similar last year. It was heart-wrenching to witness their pain.
Did you know that only...
So here's an idea (that someone else gave me).
indefensible:
Because I never shut up about it, you probably know I keep a blog of stuff my girlfriend says. It has become apparent, however, that I am not the only person in the world who has a razor-witted spouse-equivalent-unit.
So I’m kinda keen to hear other people’s stories, tales and verbatim quotes of the crazy stuff that their girlfriends/boyfriends/husbands/wives come up with. If I...
Also
Thank you for still loving me even though I left your laptop bag in a taxi last night.
in case anyone doubts it
sokeri:
I fucking adore Erin.
I just went for a shower and while I was washing my hair I realized I switched from “You” to “I” halfway through. I never claimed to be a good writer, and I’m too lazy to fix it. I have to go eat this lovely dinner Ross made me.
